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Warning: this may not be suitable for those without a sense of humor.

1) There seem to be a couple of places where my microbiome buddies yearn to escape my bodily limitations. If I'm in one particular supermarket, fuhgeddaboudit. It's like they know where they are and can't wait to escape. I am way way too familiar with that bathroom. Same goes for my daughters house. I know, no matter what, that I better bring extra wipes for the several visits I'll need to make to the bathroom before I leave. It really is like the brain cells of my digestive tract recognize the GPS coordinates or something. Anyone else have their special places?

2) Every week there seems to be one day when much of what I've eaten for the past 6 days decides to pass. The other six days are pretty normal, pretty average, decent sized deposits several times during the day. But, on that one day a week, watch out Machine Gun Kelly. I mean where could it have been hiding, there's no place to hide in the small intestine, or is there? Anyone else experience this phenomenon?

And yes I know this forum is meant for far more serious issues but I couldn't think of anywhere else to get the answers I needed. Feel free to criticize.

Last edited by NYC Googler
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For me it’s as soon as I know it’s time to leave and go somewhere. I could have been fine for hours beforehand BUT minutes before having to hop in the car it’s bathroom time. I think it’s psychological going back to prepouch and always having to be aware of where a bathroom was. I’m still working on delaying movements as much as possible especially if it’s a quick trip to a store where I push myself to not go until I get home.

I can definitely relate a little to this. There are days when emptying my pouch is awesome and a movement takes 10 seconds and holy $h!t it’s a lot and then other days when I feel like I’m not emptying as well. Life with a pouch is a journey!

You are all describing something I associate with my decades of UC.  It was something the patients often shared their experiences with during years I ran a support group. Hand on the knob on the way to work, passing a certain rest stop on the highway, being in a certain store.  Mine was CVS. I've not yet experienced it with the pouch myself, but the brain- gut connection doesn't get removed with the colon, apparently.  

We need to keep our humor and be able to laugh about ourselves

I've had it when I went home that I immediately needed to pee. That was pre-UC. I currently don't leave the house much. But when I do I usually know where all the bathrooms are.

I've had beans that stayed 1-2 days in my tract somehow. No clue why. But I also like to take metamucil to really clean me out so that usually works.

Do you ever get bathroom dreams where you dream you cannot find a suitable toilet and when you wake up, you actually have to go? 🤣🚽

I love the humor! I have always been a person that is humorous. It does help get through a lot of hard times. That and music. Oh, and chocolate.

I have the same bathroom problems. Never know when it will happen. I have also had radiation to the rectum area due to rectal cancer at age 42, so makes bathroom issues even more crappy because of the damage. I don't know where the crap is all stored. I feed raccoons that come around and see how much their little bodies take in and wonder how they fit all that food in those tiny bodies! I do not feel bloated or feel like I have a lot of crap building up. I am always nervous going out. I had my surgeries in 2008 and 2009. The first time I adventured farther from home was in 2010. My husband and I went to IKEA. It takes about 40 minutes to get there from my home. While in the store, we passed by the toilet seat isle. As soon as I saw that first seat, I said "I have to get to a bathroom". We left the store after that because I was frustrated. I was so hoping to get back to somewhat a normal life. We got down the road a bit before getting onto the highway to go back home and I really needed to go to the bathroom really bad again. I barely made it into a Burger King bathroom before dropping a major . The bathroom thing is so unpredictable. I do not go out much. I have had a new vehicle for the past year-and-a-half and only hit 4000 miles this last week and I was not the one to put all 4000 miles on it.

I always try to go to the bathroom before heading out to get as much out as possible. I don' t have the issue of having to go to the bathroom just before leaving. Mine issue is when I know I am almost home.

Does anyone wear an adult diaper when going out to feel more secure in case of an accident?

I wish everyone good luck with the bathroom issues.

I wore an adult diaper for at least 3 months after takedown, maybe longer.

I would not hesitate to wear them again if needed.

i know my body pretty well this point, but I always scope out the bathroom situation from my house to destination.


I have a daily window where I know I will have BMs, so I have to plan for that.

I traveled home by plane this past week. Flight was after 300pm, so of course I had 3 BMs on the flight.

Outgoing flight was earlier so no BMs.

my point is; I will always need to plan ahead. It’s the worst feeling when you gotta go. I don’t know how much my pouch holds. I assume it’s no greater than osteomy bag (500ml). So when my body says go, it’s game on, and my sole purpose in life at that moment is to find a place to drop that deuce.

What a life we have! Yikes

@Andreita posted:

We need to keep our humor and be able to laugh about ourselves

I've had it when I went home that I immediately needed to pee. That was pre-UC. I currently don't leave the house much. But when I do I usually know where all the bathrooms are.

I've had beans that stayed 1-2 days in my tract somehow. No clue why. But I also like to take metamucil to really clean me out so that usually works.

Do you ever get bathroom dreams where you dream you cannot find a suitable toilet and when you wake up, you actually have to go? 🤣🚽

On the dreams, there was just a big old strand!  Apparently it's a very common J-pouch person dream!

NYC Googler, same here!  I tried plain old organic psyllium husk powder (main ingredient in metamucil, except for the organic part) finally after many years of watery stools.  I had always thought it was for constipation, but then a friend recommended it for gut health and I started reading up.  Boy did I feel like a doofus!  I also wondered why my GI doc didn't tell me about it so long ago?  What a strange, antisocial thing to do!  Maybe he didn't like me.  Or (gasp) maybe he, who specialized in the GI tract, didn't know?!?!  Seems totally bonkers to me.

For me it's kind of life changing. I don't believe in vegetables, except for artichokes so there's very little bulk in my eat anything I want diet. Adding that largish teaspoon Metamucil in the morning made a world of difference. And yes why the hell wasn't I ordered to take in 20 years ago. Diarrhea you better run, your Kryptonite is coming down  and it's gonna "Bulk you up!".

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