You can drive yourself crazy second-guessing these things, Gin. Everyone has reservations about almost any surgery, and almost any surgery can turn out badly. It's tempting to amplify our memory of those reservations when things turn out badly, or imbue them with extra meaning retroactively. I was rooting for you all the way, and I'm very sad that your efforts weren't successful. You could, perhaps, consider reframing this: you tried everything, including the long shots, *even overcoming your reservations*, but your body didn't cooperate.

That, Scott, is absolutely true!

And I have definitely been down that second-guessing road; very dangerous.

Here, though, right now, I'm not actually trying to second-guess anything; actually, the one surgery which I "knew" wasn't going to work I would do again, even knowing what I know now. That's because although the experiment failed on me, it worked for the other 9 patients and opened the door for further study and refinement of the technique; if I hadn't agreed, the study would have been put on hold. So, as weird as that may sound, I'm still glad I participated.

I'm more philosophically wondering if those "gut feelings" (or whatever) have any real effect on the possibility of efficacy.

You know, something which we'll probably never know the answer to, and all that.  Just wondering...

Gin

I suppose it is a matter of degree. It is known that a positive outlook and a belief in your treatment and doctor do improve outcomes (like a placebo effect). But, that does not mean that works completely in all cases. Just like having a negative, pessimistic attitude delays healing. Your outlook actually alters stress hormones.

This is why I am always encouraging people to wait until they really behind their treatment before agreeing to the plan. 

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16358118

But, if you are talking about long shots, the postitive attitude only goes so far. You cannot "will" the impossible. I think you gave it your best shot and it just came up short.

Jan

Yes, I think it is more about the positive attitude. We all know that can make a tremendous difference, but we all also know the realities of pain, exhaustion, etc.

All we can do is try our best, I guess.

Gin

Hi Gin,

In my case it was not really the 'surgery' but the surgeon who gave me doubts...I get willies when I feel pressured or rushed into a surgery whether I believe in it or not.

I have had my share of failures but I have only really felt like it was a bad choice/outcome when the surgeon was a self-important jack-ass who told me that he was the 'only one in the world' who could fix me or save me whatever other B.S. that he was selling...I regret those surgeries terribly. It is as though I knew going into it that it was going to fail and I would pay a huge price for it.

I should have sued one or 2 of those surgeons but need them more than they need me so I feel doubly resentful.

Those are the ones that I have diffiuclty putting behind me (no pun intended).

You are not alone...we should all listen to our guts more.

Sharon

Oh, I hear you! I've only had one surgeon I wasn't comfortable with but thank God I didn't have too much to do with him. Emergency situation and maybe he did his best, I don't know. But since then I have been very sure -- as much as it is within my control -- to know my surgeon!

Gin