J pouch surgery (worth it?)

He kept on trying to push me to have a full colectomy saying I had put on weight and I looked healthy so he thought and thinks that’s the best way to go, he wasn’t bothered that I’m left with a lump above my stoma that’s not a hernia(so he thinks) which fills up of air and poo that I physically have to push on the lump for the air and poo to come out into the bag, for withinin minutes it fills again, I’m literally doing this all night and go the toilet numerous times through the night and day, I’ve had this for a year and he hasn’t wanted to do a thing for me

I’m not sure what a gaslighter is hahaha

Internet says:

"Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse or manipulation in which the abuser attempts to sow self-doubt and confusion in their victim's mind. Typically, gaslighters are seeking to gain power and control over the other person, by distorting reality and forcing them to question their own judgment and intuition."  (Their bold, not mine)

AND "The term comes from the 1938 play Gas Light, in which a husband tries to drive his wife insane by dimming the lights in their home."

That air/poop lump sounds annoying and probably is the result of incompetence during surgery.

I agree with Sara Marie! He messed up. It is time you got a second opinion! Good luck Stoma BB.

The only thing I will add here is the term Gaslighting comes as much from the 1944 film Gaslight with Ingmar Bergman and Charles Boyer as it does from the 1938 play mentioned by Sara Marie, on which the movie is based. See this: https://www.hfa.ucsb.edu/news-...nships-amp-hollywood

The movie is considered a Hollywood Classic and is still widely available in streaming and classic movie networks.

Interesting that gaslighting is a plot element in some recent horror films I have seen, in which female characters believing they are seeing something are "gaslighted" into believing that it's just a fantasy and they are losing their minds. Maika Monroe stars in two good examples of this, The Watcher (2022) and The Stranger (2024), the former of which is actually a pretty good movie.

I have even seen Gaslighting used as a negotiating tactic in my profession. When the attorney on the other side tries to get you to think your client is crazy and you are doing his bidding, when in reality, it's the other way around.

Beware the Gaslighters, lest you be Gaslit!!!!'

@CJCowdell posted:

I tend to agree with you regarding emptying often & others' ideas here (fasting, etc). I presented the "eating clean" idea (avoid simple sugars, avoid seed oils, eat whole foods, limit processed foods, etc) to my surgeon, Dr Fleshnar, Cedars Sinai, & he said that "they" do not have any hard evidence of what causes or why pouchitis occurs. I just wonder if you or anyone has seen any "real" evidence regarding proven causes of pouchitis. He has been taking blood samples of patients for 20+ years and will be doing the analysis sometime in the near future, of 30,000 (or so) blood samples, to try and correlate anything and everything (proteins, genetics, etc) related to success, failures, pouchitis, etc.

Thank-you! I appreciate you agreeing with me on that. Some people on here do agree with me and some do not agree with me. From what I seen on here and the research i have done- I believe I am right. Just like in colon folks- if they hold their poop in too long, that is holding in bacteria and toxins which can lead to infection- why are J-pouchers exempt from that logic? The truth is we are not exempt. Same thing with the bladder- if you hold your pee in too long- that can cause UTI in the bladder- why do some people with J-pouches think the pouch would be exempt from this is totally beyond my imagination.

And yes fasting allows you to get cleaned out even more.

I do not have any hard-core evidence but I am just using logic and from what I read on the internet about research and bacteria. Hopefully that doctor will come up with something with his analysis.

@Stoma BB posted:

At this moment in time I’m going for a second opinion because my surgeon who did my stoma said it’s all in my head about not getting on well with what I have now and will not even contemplate doing a reversal until I have seen a psychologist

That surgeon seems like he is fucking out of his mind. Definitely see a second opinion. He is either crazy or a gaslighter haha

@Sara Marie posted:

Internet says:

"Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse or manipulation in which the abuser attempts to sow self-doubt and confusion in their victim's mind. Typically, gaslighters are seeking to gain power and control over the other person, by distorting reality and forcing them to question their own judgment and intuition."  (Their bold, not mine)

AND "The term comes from the 1938 play Gas Light, in which a husband tries to drive his wife insane by dimming the lights in their home."

That air/poop lump sounds annoying and probably is the result of incompetence during surgery.

PREACH!!!!

I have no idea what he is playing at, I think he is trying to cover his tracks, I have just spoken to my doctor and he has referred me to a consultant out the area because I don’t want to see any of my old consultants colleagues that he knows and would obviously stick up for him

He is definitely a gaslighter

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

@Stoma BB posted:

I have no idea what he is playing at, I think he is trying to cover his tracks, I have just spoken to my doctor and he has referred me to a consultant out the area because I don’t want to see any of my old consultants colleagues that he knows and would obviously stick up for him

He is definitely a gaslighter

Yeah that is the worst, when people people stick up for the wrong person. Its very common of employees to defend their co-workers and people in the area to defend the wrong people.

You are doing great by going out of the area.