I have been on this site before. I don't have little quotes below my name to list what I have been through. However, when I had surgery for an ostomy, let me set the setting. I was a model and avid lifter...I also played sports. However, I wasn't even 21 when I got struck by an opponent I couldn't see until in laid red-UC. I only had it for 4 months, and was operated on. You heard that correct 4 months! To top it off, I was left at the hospital when admitted, for 5 days. I had steroids in me, nothing to eat, drink,...family didn't show up in all that time. My mother- who I lived with, was in the midst a bad marriage, and had anxiety to drive 1 1/2 hours- issue in itself- so I was by myself for 5 days, until I called a family member and told them I was proceeding to go and have surgery. Now understand I was young, no food, nothing to drink, etc. The people told me, it's just a bag noone sees it, you can go about life as normal. Uhm....tell that to someone who is wearing a T-shirt( they can see a hump in a shirt ). They made it seem transitionless. Personally, if I would have been told the whole truth, I would have never done it at the time. Anyway family came up immediately. They tried talking to the docs, but bc a former great president( coughs ) passed/signed a law, anyone 18 or older has consent, it use to be 21( this would be a good example ). I just turned 19 2 months prior. I felt something wasn't right...but I was sold. After I had surgery, my weight went down to 128 at one point. I suffered a possible TIA, developed a DVT( blood clot )- I actually had to keep enforcing this to the medical staff that my leg was not right- they wrote it off. They even got me a pressured squeezer on my ankle. I enforced it more and thank gosh I did...DVT was of course in my leg. Reason? Nurses did not get me up to walk after surgery! Then preluding this, you can imagine what I really thought when I seen the surgery. That of above, yeah...nothing much like it. So that in itself was traumatic, maybe a little extra as I wasn't fully prepared or prompted as I probably should have been. Anyway, that is the setting.....
I developed depression bad to the point people thought I was going to commit suicide. It was crazy, just a few months prior, I was physically at the most muscle mass I ever had in my life and working out 6 days a week....However, I was probably one bad day away from what people feared, suicide. Understand the setting, the circumstances, and age. I bring all this up bc to this day, a decade later, I still battle depression. I cannot say anything has gotten easier, I just became mentally stronger. The whole surgery has not gotten better with time- yes I know how to use appliances etc- it still has not gotten better. However, I wonder why I remain unhappy...I have gained a lot of muscle back, I was told I would never be able to lift above 50lbs, yet I blew that number out of the water lol. I am 200lbs@ 5ft.8.....
This all brings me to the questions I have.....Would I be a good candidate for a 1 step J pouch sugery? I have 75% of colon gone, yes the rectum and part of the sigmoid are still in there just floating. This would be more like a creation of a J pouch and connection in one surgery, however it's different than a one bc I already have 75% out. Also I have had my ostomy for about 10 years. I mentioned my height at 5ft.8, because of blood supply connection to hook up. My build is muscular and stocky, I am 22%bf. I know if I had surgery I wouldn't be able to go through all that again to have another ostomy...I don't think I could take it, mentally. Also, can this one step be done in my situation laparoscopic?
-Second question is concerning- I noticed something on this and other forums throughout the years...there seems to be a higher rate of people developing Chrons disease in people with J pouches than those who keep or have ostomies. In fact, I rarely see someone who has an ostomy develop it. Yet I see people w J pouches who do, enough for me to notice over time. Idk if there is an epidemiological study for this, probably not, but something I did notice actually. I don't know if it has anything to do with bacteria within the pouch etc. Maybe it's just me, but enough to notice. Not a high incidence in all pouchers, just noticed it being present vs ostomy. That was my second concern.
I thank all of you who did try to help me way back when...and for reading this. Understand I am not downing anyone, you have to understand how unique my situation was, how quick everything happened to me. Yes I get hit on by women, sometimes men???Lol...Yes I learned to " Hide everything." Yes some doctors look at me like I am a bit of a "Freak" for my physique w the surgery and how small I was before. I had one doc pull me aside while getting tested for strep, and he asked what I did to get to 200lbs at my height bc he had patients that had surgery and guess are not gaining weight. Had a chiro tell me I developed body dysmorphic disorder lol and why I keep going and adding muscle- the opposite of anorexic- you don't think your big enough...I can honestly say it took me over 2 years to come up w a workout program and appropriate diet before I even implemented it, so most muscle gained was in last 4 years. You have to work with homeostasis, metabolism, and of course diet and training...but certain movements you should never do. You need to focus more on thoracic extension with hip flextion( to take away from abdominals ). Anyway, I can talk all day on this issue and I am wasting your readers time....I just wanted to say thanks for reading...behind all that I am unhappy. A modeling agency was going to hire me- yes I tried again, and won an audition, but they said for me not to get bigger shoulders to be natural as I could for clothes.....
...I had to tell them about the surgery. Modeling isn't a big deal, the ostomy just effects me to the point I am considering a J pouch. I can give pointers to anyone as via the gym etc....and God Bless you if you viewed this as life saving if you suffered for years...I just didn't...it happened so fast, it's been a decade and I still remember normal. Thank you