Camping, HELP!

I went camping a number of times in National Park and other campgrounds and had no significant problems using the bathroom (with running water), outhouses and porta potties.  In Eastern Europe, I encountered Turkish toilets (hole in the floor) and on occasion had to use cornfields or the woods.  Although sometimes challenging, I always got the job done.  You should ask your friend about the sanitary facilities where you will be camping and be sure to bring enough TP in case none is present there.  Enjoy your weekend!

I hear your struggle! I went with some friends back in college and it was hard to go to the restroom alone without having someone else be like, “oh I have to go too, I’ll go with you.” When all I really wanted was a few min in the restroom alone. 

Do you know how far you’ll be from the restroom? That’s always another concern I have is how far I am from the restroom. Waking up and going to the bathroom half asleep is tough, having to unzip the tent, waking everyone up, etc. 

I say give it a shot. Or maybe if you aren’t comfortable staying, you can go visit for the day? 

Yes! Stuff like that is exactly what I’m worried about. And what if they want to go do outdoorsy stuff like hiking? Which I assume they will, since it is camping lol. I just always feel like I have to prepare myself for things like that, but I’m not going to be able to really. Or I imagine so, anyhow. My anxiety is outrageous. 

BUT when I told him I was thinking about going, bc I had told him I don’t know if my anxiety will let me, he said said he would get me the name of the campground and stuff for me. He’s very sweet and attentive so I feel like I would be ok. I’m trying to not let my condition control my life but it’s so hard. And scary. And I don’t like it. At all. 😂 

If the campground site has portable toilets you should be okay.  A bigger concern I would have venturing out into the woods is bears.  There was a woman killed by a bear coming out of a portable toilet at a campsite in rural Alberta a few years ago.  Campsites with food are notorious for attracting bears and other animals that can be spooked rather easily.  

A few weeks ago I was hiking in the Acadia National Park in Maine, while on vacation up there.  There is a 4 mile trail that loops around Jordan Pond, near Cadillac Mountain.  Supposedly, there are bears, moose, elk, and coyotes in this park.  Anyway, there is a portable toilet at the very beginning of the trial but none along the trail.  I did the hike anyway.  It took me around 1.5 hours, I made it okay and did not have to use the bathroom until I got back.  If I did, it would have been a bear in the woods imitation.  The only wildlife I saw were red squirrels, which were ubiquitous in that park.  They are smaller than the grey ones we have in Connecticut and quicker in their movements.

Back when I had UC I went fishing in rural areas and on more than one occasion I had emergency situations that forced me to evacuate in the woods, on leaves.  I learned to bring toilet paper with me.  I would pack it in a tackle box.  It is better than using leaves.  As long as you have toilet paper, woods can be accessed and privacy can likely be secured in the woods somewhere.

If you are too uncomfortable, don't do it.  If the dude likes you, there will be a second date doing something else.

I don't go anywhere without proper facilities. If i want to hike there  better be potties along the way. Walking gets things moving. I know how you feel about using the restroom  by yourself. Good luck. I hope your able to do it.

If the washroom facilities are cramped and close together, or someone in the group is in the next stall, you might become anxious and nervous and not be able to go properly. When that happens, gas and stool that is pushing to come out backs up even more, and you might become very uncomfortable or painful, especially if someone suggests going hiking. I'm not saying don't go, but just be aware. And this is a new relationship, and you don't know him very well yet. He might have some experience with UC from his previous relationship, but you don't know about his friends.  Some people can be understanding and respectful and discreet, others can be juvenile, and you're stuck the whole weekend. That will be awful and stressful, possibly a deal-breaker for a new relationship. Just be prepared, or get to know him much better and go camping in future. Best wishes.

I'm a guy and I know guys too and know what they're like; he'll say anything to convince you to go, especially as you'll be in a tent together, possibly in the woods and miles away from no where: he maybe sweet and attenttive but you only have his word that his ex had UC and if she did then maybe while together, she never had a UC flare up or if she did, it was mild and she was able to hide her symptoms, as I often did; otherwise, once you told him you suffer from UC, that should of been the end of it, until he does actually get to know you, your condition and how you feel, especially in such circumstances and when in the company of people you don't actually know,

Theres nothing more embarrassing, well there probably is but, to have to keep leaving a group of people to use the toilet, who all are watching " me," sorry you, return after a fourth trip to the toilet.

You don't know him that well and you certainly don't know his friends; feeling how you do, could make for an uncomfortable weekend.

You should be full of excitement, looking forward to your weekend away with a new boyfriend, thinking of all the things you can and will do together, as well hiking, kayaking and the likes but you're not; you're writing on a web forum full of trepidation.

Whether one has a j pouch or not, it's usually uncomfortable for anyone to go to the bathroom with other people around. Likely everyone gets a bit gaseous and constipated or 'backed up'. You'll have opportunity to shit alone I'm sure. Just be honest with the guy and tell him you'll be going to the biffy more often than the average bear (and you won't get attacked by a bear). Sorry if I sound glib but I say just go and try to enjoy the beauty and peace of nature and the potential for a trusting honest relationship. (Them's my 2 cents). 

Thank you all! Very good points. I have decided to not go, but because my grandmother is in the hospital and we live together. So she will need me when she gets home. He actually gave me an out before I gave him a for sure answer. He said he understood if I decided to not go because of the circumstances with my grandmother, and also bc it’s such short notice and I may not exactly be comfortable with it yet. Which I found to be nice of him. He said he could sense my uncertainty about it. So it’s all good. But I will be better prepared for when I do decide to go do Thank you all! 

Perfect. He sounds like a sweetie but it would likely be easier to have a 'less demanding' 2nd date.

(My guess is  your grandmother is lucky to have you as a grand daughter.)

Thank you JHendrix! That’s really sweet of you. And yes, he seems like a pretty decent guy so far. *fingers crossed*

Oh! And I told him if he took someone else camping I’d completely understand. (I’d be hurt of course, but just wondering where he’s at.) His response was “Hell no. Ain’t that guy.” So that’s a good sign I believe. Again, fingers crossed! Thanks again y‘all for all the support!

I think this was a good all around result. You should be with your Grandma and certainly there will be other occasions for the camping trip. When you get the chance you can collect further information on the campgrounds involved. It might be a good idea (or not) after say 3 or 4 dates. Bottom line is whether you are comfortable with it. I sometimes push the envelope on my own comfort levels but that’s me. On that trip I had a few weeks ago to Acadia National Park I really debated doing that 4 mile hike around Jordan Pond because I knew there were no restrooms and I had not brought any toilet paper with me. The two decisive factors were: (1) I felt really good and figured I could do the hike in 1.5 hours and knew there would be restrooms available at the end of the trail; and (2) the weather was great. I am really glad I did that hike- it was great!

Hey CTBarrister...glad to hear about your hike. I was starting to wonder if you felt you could leave your house given the killer bears and the nostril-swimming amoeba! (Said entirely light heartedly!)

I have been camping dozens of times since my surgery. Other people run off to the toilet as much, if not more, than me. When you decide to try it, I suggest just you and your boyfriend, or maybe one other couple, and avoid the big group thing. On our group outings, everyone is in a different place in regard to fitness, so we don’t do long hikes together. 

My boys were 6 and 8 when I had my surgery. They grew up with camping and it is a favorite family vacation. They are in their 30s now.

Jan

I love camping, but the truth is it's just not practical. I need proper facilities, and I'm a hygene freak. If possible I would always choose a cabin with bathroom in the woods over a tent with questionable facilities.