Warm baths/showers after bowel movements. I always liked Nupercainal - it's in the Preparation H section of drug stores. It's soothing going on. The active ingredient in Dibucane which your drug store might carry. A quick internet search indicates that Nupercainal is sold at Walgreens. There are many other ointments and salves to try. Maybe just get an assortment and see which one works best for your daughter.
I hope she finds relief very soon.
kathy