Dear Eniak1980,
We have identical medical issues. I'm always dealing with anal skin irritation. I've found that the best (non-irritating) wipes are Target's Fragrance-free. I take out about 25 at a time rinse them in warm water and ring-out any remaining chemicals. I've tried every wipe on the market and these are the best. After using the softest toilet paper that I can find, then I use the moist wipes, and then let it dry for a couple of minutes, and then cover the irritated area with generic petroleum jelly. I am never without petroleum jelly on the irritated area.
Also, when the butt burn is really bad, I clean the irritated area and apply Lidocaine Hydrochloride Jelly 2% (only by prescription), when the burning subsides, I add petroleum jelly.
PS - I've tried the Lidocaine 5%, but it burns like hell. The 2% burns a little in the beginning but, after 30 seconds it starts to numb the area.
I hope this helps! Do hesitate to contact me if you have any other questions!