I think it’s probably worth trying a few things to see if you can end the overnight incontinence, at least. That’s not the outcome to expect at this stage. The stool consistency that tends to work best is something like pudding or applesauce. You haven’t described yours, so it’s tricky to know what might work best for you. I’ve found that things go better at night if I don’t manage things so aggressively during the day. I use Lomotil (like Imodium) at bedtime, but not during the day. I wouldn’t recommend Pepto Bismol for daily, long-term use, though it helps some people a lot when there’s trouble brewing. I’d suggest using the Metamucil at meal time (I use it with breakfast and dinner) - perhaps that’s what you already do? We’re you given any instructions to try to “stretch” your pouch? The basic idea is to gradually delay bathroom visits more and more, to get the frequency down. This should be done gently and can take a while to change things.
It’s possible that you have pouchitis, but that wouldn’t be my first guess.
Good luck!