Hello all,
I've had my pouch for about 20 months and pouchitis for 17 of that. The first three months were wonderful until my first bout of pouchitis occurred 3 months post takedown. Over the next year I went through 9 courses of antibiotics - Metronidazole, Co-Amoxiclav, Ciprofloxacin - the first two had no effect whatsoever other than making me feel ill, Cipro seemed to work at first but eventually lost effectiveness. I also tried maximum dosages of VSL3 with no effect, and tried modifying my diet and taking Metamucil again with no response.
I then went on a clinical trial of Alicaforsen, which also had no effect (although there is a chance that I was on the placebo - I get to try the definite real thing in October).
I saw my surgeon for a follow-up today and he said it is very unusual to have such a poor response to so many treatments so soon. Because of this he's sending me for an MRI to rule out CD (although past biopsies and scopes show no evidence of this). He seemed to imply that I had exhausted medical options and that I might want to consider ditching the pouch. This is the absolute worst nightmare for me as during my 2 years with a stoma I coped very badly psychologically. This really is not an option for me - I would rather be physically sick than feel mentally hopeless.
I feel so low, hopeless and totally alone. I don't like talking to friends or family as most of the conversation is me explaining my condition, leaving very little room for actually venting my emotions. I do not usually like seeking advice online as quite often I just get told 'a stoma won't be that bad, it'll help you live again'. I know people have good intentions but I cannot stress enough how I struggled psychologically with the ileostomy. I don't even want to contemplate that option. I am only 22 and I feel like the past 4 years of my life have been totally dominated by this disease. I'm really struggling to cope.
I wondered if anyone had been in the same situation or had any advice, or general words of wisdom. I just want to feel hopeful about my life again and find a way to deal with what's happening.