Hi, My name is Wendy, and I am an old member here -- joining in late October, 2003 when my son, Scott (age 24 at the time) was about to have his first surgery (at Mt. Sinai Hospital by Dr. Michael Harris) to form his j-pouch. After 3 months with an ileostomy (and hospitalization for 2 pulmonary emboli -- that was scary!!!), he had his second reconnection surgery in early February, 2004.

I'm not sure there is anyone here that still remembers me - but I feel compelled to write an update for you all. So often this site is a listing of hassles and setbacks, and those who do well disappear to live their good lives. I admit - I was one of those, so the good story I have to tell really doesn't get told. I think those facing this surgery need to hear that the outcomes are good many many times!!

Scott is one of those who has had a good outcome. After his surgeries, he had a few blockages, and was hospitalized once for one that wouldn't pass easily. He also - I think - had a few minor cases of Pouchitis, but other than that, his life has been good, and he's living normally. It was just under 3 months after his second surgery when he began caddying at a golf course again, as he did summers when he was in college. that summer, he also spent hunting for a job in his field, and by October he had a graphic design position at a local newspaper. Since then, he's changed jobs once and is now production manager at another local newspaper. He met the love his life a few years ago, and last September 19th, they married. His wife has Celiac's Disease, and I think it was his experiences with having Ulcerative Colitis and his surgeries which made him especially sensitive to what her life is like with her gluten free diet. It all came naturally to him -- it was no big deal! I also believe that his experience with this illness matured him in a way he would not have otherwise. It's an unpleasant way to mature and I do not wish it on anyone, but I guess one takes the silver linings where you can find them.

Of course he has to make some accommodations for his surgeries. For example, if he is going to a place where it will be difficult to find a bathroom (like out on a boat), he does not eat a large meal before going!

Sometimes I look at his life -- and I am eternally grateful for his health. It's something I will never take for granted, though sometimes I still wait for "the other shoe to drop", too.

I guess another reason I came back here, and am writing this, is because I just found out that a member of our church -- a 28 year old woman -- has just had this surgery, I believe -- and I think it was done by the same surgeon (Dr. Harris) at Mt. Sinai - though I'm not sure of those facts. I'm trying to make contact with her - and / or her parents - to give some moral support should they want it. It makes me relive the entire experience - and realize how grateful I am for how things turned out. I hope to guide her here should she want that - and not everyone does. I have to admit that my son did not want to come here during his illness. It was all too much, I think, and he relied on me to screen any information I might have and give it to him in doses that he could handle.

Anyway -- hi to any old members who might remember me - - and I wish only the best to the newer ones who are active here now.

What a lovely post! Thank you so much for sending your update! Best wishes to you & your son and family. I hope "the other shoe never drops".

Thank you, anjuli. I looked at your profile, and see that you have been through a lot - like you had to have this all done TWICE! However, it's been a few years, so it's my hope that this is all behind you... My best to you - and that health stays close to you. ;-)

Thanks for coming back with your son's success story! You are right, we need you and others like you, since this site seems heavily weighted with problems and failures, sometimes scaring those wanting truthful information about what they are getting into and thinking that this surgery is nothing but one nightmare after another.

But, for most of us, the nightmare eventually ends and it is back to living the good life and enjoying our health.

Jan

P.S. Even if the other shoe does drop, your son will be well equipped to deal with it, then move on again. It is what we do...

Jan - - I do remember you - very well. You always had mountains of knowledge -- and were very supportive and encouraging - no matter what the situation.

And -- you are correct. If the other shoe drops, Scott will be able to handle it. It's about that maturity he's gained, I think. It's me I wonder about! LOL!

Thank you ever so much for your post sweet meaow! I am at the point of just deciding to have this surgery and have found this site extremely helpful but you're right that there is a lot of negative...it is wonderful to see from someone that I am making a good decision for myself and my family! Again Thank You!

Tiffany

Thank you for your post and I am so glad to hear of your son's return to a full and healthy life. You have given a lot of hope to me who is only one month into having a j-pouch. You've made my day

Thanks, daffodilly and cmctiffany for your reply to me. And, I'm very glad that I could shed a bit of optimism on your journeys. Everyone's journey with this is unique, and I'm not sure that anyone gets through this without an "issue" or two, but the vast majority can be worked through with the other side being "good health".

I am one of those that knows I should come back more often to share my success, but have been so involved with life, forget(or get to busy) to come back and help others.

I think Jan said it best (as she normally does).
But, for most of us, the nightmare eventually ends and it is back to living the good life and enjoying our health.

I went through 15 surgeries to get to the point I am at. I had two different J-Pouches created before finally getting Dr. Fazio to do a K-Pouch for me. Since having the K-Pouch, there have been minor hiccups, but life is good.

I had the K-Pouch surgery approximately five years ago and have not had to go back for any other surgeries or complications related to digestive issues. I have subsequently run several half marathons (tentatively plan on running a full marathon in December, but know I need to be careful with it due to all the bouncing of the intestine and staples). I now have a two year old son and another on the way. I have one week left of my Masters Degree Classes and am coming up on 15 years for a medical device company.

Long story short. The disease is awful and makes you wonder how you will ever get through each day. The surgeries and recovery make you wonder if you did the right thing and if it was really worth it. Once over the hill of challenges though, you gain alot of maturity, knowledge and most important "life". I am so glad you posted as you made me realize that I should try and come back more often. I also am one of the old timers that learned so much from this website that Bill has put together and the wonderful collection of people on it such as Jan that are full of knowledge and support.

I wish the best for your son. I still have a thesis to write, but I hope to follow Jan and many others leads to come back and offer the kind of support that I received when I was going through all of my challenges.

Mike S (a.k.a Singleguy and later Marriedguy and now I guess guy with kids :-) ).

Mike, So glad to see you again. Even more glad you are doing so well. You give encouragement to newcomers.

Just wish I could find more time to get on here more often. Too often this site is over filled with people that are having problems (rightfully so as this is the best place to come to discuss, vent, or listen), but people that have gone through it and come out the other side tend to get busy "living" again and forget to come back. For those going through problems, I always try and tell people not to get to scared by all of the issues and complaints people have on here. While they are all very legitimate, you have to take into account that these people are looking for answers, while the ones that have the answers have no need to come here.

I'm so glad to hear from both of you. I have a vague recollection of you - (marriedguy) - when you were "singleguy". I want to say congratulations on your marriage -- and your child! That, and the fact that you have a thesis to write is a testament to your health and getting on with your life. You have been through a lot more than many -- but you have come out the other side with lots to offer. From watching my son get on with his life, I can see that his experience has given him a love of life and the desire to live fully in a way he might not have. There's a special appreciation for the little things.

Once in a while it's good to have threads like this -- letting everyone know that there is life after these surgeries.