Hi all,
My Mom has fought a good fight and really tried to overcome all her medical obstacles, but she decided today that she is too tired to continue to fight. We admitted her to a hospice house this afternoon. We are very sad but supportive of her decision. We have stopped all her meds and taken her off the wound vac. She too many problems to list them all but we are expecting her to become septic within a few days and then to lapse into a coma. I want to thank you all for the information you have provided regarding her ostomy care (even though you didn't know you were helping me. Your tips and advise to all others was invaluable)
The next few days will be very tough on my family, but I am so very glad that there was room at the hospice house and we are not doing this at the hospital.
Norma

I'm sorry to hear of your mom's difficult decision and wish her peace and comfort.
I also send thoughts of comfort and love for all of your family members who will be lovingly supporting her.
I really don't know what else to say other than hope a calmness comes for all of you. Again, I'm sorry.

Norma, I am sorry to hear that your mom has not rallied like you had hoped. Sometimes there is just more than the body can handle, particularly when we are aged. But, how wonderful that she has such a loving family to support her in her decision to die with dignity and grace. You will find that hospice is not a sad place at all, but a place to rejoice in having lived a wonderful life. The hospice staff are the most incredible people I have ever met.

You will surprise yourself at how normal everything seems with this, particularly since you know your mom really put up a valiant effort.

Peace to you and your family.

Jan

Norma, I am so sorry about your Mom.

I can only echo what Jan has said about how wonderful the Hospice nursing staff are. They were a great source of comfort to all of us when my Dad was with them. They truly are angels.

My love and thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time.

Take care.

Shell

Norma - just wondering how you're doing. I hope you're spending some nice time with your mother. I have a friend who sang to her mother as she died. I always wondered how she could do that without breaking down. I'm getting to that point - not the singing part because that wouldn't be a nice sendoff coming from me - but the caring part and being together part.

I'm thinking of you.

kathy

Norma, I'm so sorry to read your post, I wish you and your family strength and I hope your mother is able to pass peacefully and without discomfort.

Norma
I too am very sad to hear this news.
Hospice is wonderful. My Dad had prostate cancer and they were phenomenal and I learned so much from them.They gave me a wonderful booklet about death and the dying experience, if you received it do read it, if not, ask about getting a copy.
Peace to all.
Holly

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. The process is slower than I ever anticipated. Her birthday was Sunday and she may have used up her reserve to make it that far. All of her children and many of her grand children and great grands were there to celebrate with her.
She has gotten much weaker since then. Again thank you for your heartfelt wishes for peace and comfort.

Yes, quite often there is a need to be able to say goodbye, even if it is through a fog of confusion and inability to make sense. There is a "knowing" that your loved ones have come to greet you and let you know it is OK to go now. This is when it gets really hard, not for your mom, but for you. How to let go when everything inside you wants her to stay...

My thoughts are with you.

Jan

Norma - thanks for checking in. How nice to spend one more birthday with your mother. She must feel blessed to have so much family surrounding her!

Remember to take care of you too.

kathy

Mom died peacefully in her sleep this morning. She spent a long time with the chaplain yesterday and then spoke with her doctor. She died on her terms and knowing she was loved. She has left her imprint on this world through her acts of love and kindness. There are so many people who are better for knowing her. I have lost not only a mom but a confidant and a friend.
Call your mom or dad or aunt or uncle, grandma a family member that you love but have been too busy to talk to and let them know how much you appreciate them and the influence they have in your life. Let them know that you love them.

Thanks again for checking in. I'm so glad she lived on her terms. I hope the saddness is replaced with smiles as soon as possible.

kathy

Hi Norma,

My thoughts are with you and your family at this sad time. Cherish the happy memories, your Mom sounds like she was very much loved by everyone around her.

Take care.

Shell

My sincerest sympathy to you and your family. Mom's are special people. I hope that thoughts of her bring you comfort and not sadness.

nys

My thoughts are with you. We laid my mom to rest on the day your mother passed away. She passed one week ago. It is hard but we will make it, right?

Mom's are hard to lose but wonderful to enjoy great memories of. Now we must go on to be the women they taught us to be, in honor of them.

HUGS to you.