I lost my pregnancy at 12 weeks; went in for my regular 12 week checkup and there was no heartbeat and a large hematoma had formed where the placenta should have been. I had a little mini but painful period 8 weeks after the D&C, but I'm still feeling blah. I've had my J-pouch for 6 years and have done quite well. However, now I am terrified of miscarrying again and of the trauma the D&C may have caused to my already sensitive organs. Any advice, history, or simple encouragement from anyone with similar issues? this was my first pregnancy,a nd it took us 6 months to conceive.
Thanks, Erika

Erika, I'm so sorry. I lost our 2nd child at the same stage - I was almost 12 weeks. Turned out the fetus had stopped developing at about 9 weeks, but nothing happened - so called Missed Abortion. I had a d&c and was miserable. We conceived about 4 months later, and have our lovely daughter, Embla, as a result. Try to remind yourself that usually this happens because there was something wrong with the development of the pregnancy. You don't have to face the horrible prospect of being asked to decide whether or not to carry the baby to term. Unless you have specific problems in conceiving, I wouldn't imagine this makes your next pregnancy any more high risk than any other person's. My 3rd pregnancy certainly went fine and wasn't treated as high risk. 6 months to conceive doesn't sound abnormal to me. I can really understand that you still feel blah and tender after the D&C, especially wth the anatomy we have, but the only advice I can give is just to try to relax and try again. At least you now know you CAN conceive. In my first pregnancy, my doc warned me that 75% of pregnancies end in miscarriage! I was horrified and couldn't believe it, but she said that lots of people don't even get a chance to realise that they are pregnant before they lose the fetus. You knew because you were trying to conceive. I wish you lots of luck in your next pregnancy; believe me, when you hold that little baby you'll be so glad that this was the one that made it! I was very sad about the one we lost, but if that hadn't happened, we wouldn't have had Embla...and she's just wonderful

I miscarried our second also and had a D&C about 10 weeks (we knew the pregnancy wasn't viable much earlier though). My girlfriend had the exact experience you did - at 12week ultrasound she was told the baby stopped developing at 9 weeks - and she also had a D&C. We are both now pregnant again, I'm 27 weeks, she's 25. We were both nervous wrecks through the first trimester and even longer for her, but here we both are, due to deliver July babies.

Hard as what you are going through is, you will find the strength to keep going. Definitely talk to your dr to make sure that your labs are okay and that nothing else is causing how you are feeling. Don't forget, the emotional side of what happened could certainly be making you feel awful too.

Be kind to yourself and do some things that make you happy as you wait to try again (I'm assuming you have to wait 2 cycles?). Then, go ahead and try again and remember that just because it happened once doesn't mean it will happen again. MOst of the women I know have had a miscarriage at some point during the building of their families.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I too lost a baby at 12 weeks, although it was during my pre-UC days.The D&C was traumatic. It was my second baby, so I had my first little guy to keep me going, but it didn't stop me from grieving the loss . Then I lost the next pregnancy at 6 weeks. I got so focused on getting pregnant that I couldn't get pregnant.Needed to relax and take my mind off it, (this drove my hubby nuts, I never do things small....) I filled the house with fish tanks. Yeah, fish. 55gallons, 29gallons, 10 gallons, fish in every room of the house. Aquariums are supposed to decrease blood pressure and are supposed to relax you. The next three babies were all exactly 2 years apart almost to the day. All this to say, I remember the pain and the loss, and its ok to greive the loss of your baby. Praying God blesses you in His time.
LoriP