Hi friends,
I have been off the board a bit for the last year as reverted back to an ileo and have been enjoying my health. I am 39 this year, and contemplating whether I persist with a final attempt at IVF. I have done 2 transfers already. But do have 2 frozen embryos still. After so much surgery, I am a bit terrified of more problems. My main concerns are getting a prolapsed stoma, and blockages mid term (which seems the be when they predominantly occur).
What do you think? I am not sure of the joy outweighs the stress of the risks.

Hi Saff,
I will give you the version of the road not taken...I've had a k pouch since I turned 18...got married a year later and suffered from the usual fertility problems...blocked tubes, adhesions and folded uterus...in those days IVF was rare and candidates carefully selected..I tried and got refused. As years went by, here is France IVF was availible to one and all and fully funded...but I let my friends and family talk me out of it...too dangerous for the pouch/valve etc...don't rock the boat, don't put your pouch at risk etc...I was divorced so it was less of an issue....
Fell in love and listened then too...same warnings...so I never pushed it..I managed to concieve naturally 6xs in all but never carried to term...and never forced the issue...never took the chance of harming my pouch...so now I am 50, IVF and pregnancy are off the books and my pouch died of its own accord...so what have I won?
No babies, broken pouch anyway.
The moral of the story? Do what you feel is right for you...no regrets...if You Want a baby then go for it or 'die' trying...I didn't believe hard enough, didn't push it, didn't take the risk...I was just plain too scared...regrets are a terrible thing to live with.
Sharon

Well said sharon, i believe in no regrets! I've had 3 goes of IVF and only got pregnant on the frozen cycle, so you may as well have the frozen cycle and see what happens. My daughter is 4 and believe me the Joy she has brought us was worth anything, my pregnancy was fine! Good luck to you whatever you decide. Having to go through the heartache of IVF isn't fair after eveything we have been through.
Nikki

And don't rule out adoption if parenting is a dream, but concerns about your pouch/quality of life/complications, etc. are an issue.

I am incredibly blessed with 2 amazing children, and in many ways, they are pretty lucky they do not share my DNA

All the best in whatever you decide!

I had two babies through IVF with a perm ileo. My "babies" are not babies anymore at 5 and 2 1/2. I had an obstruction during first pregnancy which was scary but did get resolved without surgery.y second pregnancy was perfect. Both my children were full term c section deliveries. I am thankfully every day that I chose to pursue IVF. It was hard to decide to have the second after the obstruction with the first but I am so glad I did.

My kids are just the most joyful part of life. We are wrapping up a week at Disney with such beautiful memories. I can't imagine a world without the craziness that is having kids. Definitely worth the effort to get pregnant and work through the issues.

Hi Sharon, Nikki, JJA and Jill, thanks for responding. Yeah I think you are right about regrets and not having any, I should give it a go. It's encouraging Jill that you had two pregnancies with an ileo. The doctors I have contact with have hardly any experience with pregnancy and ileos so that didn't make me feel very confident. I have a couple of tests to do to make sure I'm in good shape for a transfer ie. no hydrosalpinx, and anemia etc. But I'm starting to think it's worth a shot.

Remorse is so much easier to deal with than regret Go for it...and then when your kids break your favorite vase or vomit on your brand new shoes...you can have remorse!
Good luck
Sharon
ps...there are always ways of working around it when it doesn't work out...I married a man with 2 daughters and ended up becoming a very young grandmother of 2 adorable angels!

My second pregnancy was with my perm. ileo and I had no complications at all. I agree with the above posters...no regrets! Children are such a beautiful blessing and make your life more full than you could ever imagine. God bless!

Benton is a happy and healthy 5 1/2 month old. I had my perm ielo put in September '09, got pregnant in Feb '10 - he was born Oct '10. No "real" complications during pregnancy - just stoma size change and stretching. I wouldn't trade him for the WORLD! Looking forward to having more in the future - just need to catch up on my sleep right now...

Wow you guys are inspiring. Thanks. x